I Was the Care Taker of an Elderly Man

I have known this man for such a long time. He was part of my life since when I could remember. As a child, I looked up to him. I thought he had it all. As I grew up, I started to see his failings. Many instances he let me down and I began to see for the first time, that he was just a man.

I still had great feelings for him. Though I knew he did not have it all together, my mind still thought high of him. I did not want to believe he could fail. I always rested in the fact that he was big and strong and I was safe with him. I always wanted to protect his identity and cover him so others would love him as I would. You see, I wanted others to love him as well. I began to see for the first time, how MUCH I wanted to protect him.

When I came to a relationship with Jesus Christ, the dynamics changed. I knew I could not afford to cover him up anymore. I knew I had to talk to him about Jesus and what Jesus can do for him. All my attempts to share the gospel with him was, a wrestling at best. I did not make any sense to him. He began to hate me for the way I changed. I began to see for the first time, I was in conflict with him.

Yet my feelings for him was more or less the same. I could sense the conflict when I was with him. I could not pursue God because then, the conflict would increase. I was always living less than holy, less than triumphant, christian life because I wanted to please him and not afford to give him up. You see, I was fearful of letting him go, not because of what he could do to me, but I did not want to lose him. For the first time in my life I began to see I was in bondage.

Then came years of struggle in my christian walk. I wanted to live holy, I wanted to reflect Jesus but I could not because I was in bondage and fearful of not exposing this grand-daddy in my life. I asked myself, in what way he was contributing to my life. Why I was so fearful of him. Why any advances in my spiritual life was directly linked to my relationship with this man. God faithfully revealed this man’s control over my life. How he was not contributing to my life at all, how he constantly wanted to keep me in his control, for his advantage. God’s word encouraged me to part with this man’s influence. I could do it only God’s way. For the first time in my life, I began to know, I needed to expose him.

So that’s what I did. With the grace and strength of God I exposed him. I knew it was going to cost me perhaps my reputation, my friendships, my position and the list goes on…But that did not stop me from exposing him and quit rotting under his control. For once, I made a choice that would impact me in ways indescribable. I confessed to my friends, to godly people about this man’s control in my life. It was time he came into the light. The scripture I relied on was ” He that confess his sins, receives mercy.” I did not want to cherish sin in my life. I knew as long as I have secrecy I could not grow spiritually. For the first time in my life, I began to identify this man as “the old man” the bible talks about.

My flesh, my carnal man, the “self” that bible tells us to crucify, that is who he is. He is still in me. But I am not under his power anymore. The minute I exposed him, he did not have sustenance in me. He lost the grips over my life. He was not controlling anymore. He was wounded. I am living a life style where I expose him continually. The only power I know now is the Power of the cross. The Power of the cross set me free from all other powers. For the first time in my life, I began to live in freedom.

So now, since you see how this old man controlled my life, what are you afraid of? Expose the old nature, crucify it on the cross and experience the freedom God wants to give you. Come clean and soar on high with God. I will mention the nature of this man in my life. He was proud, craved praises of man, he made me work for my glory, He made me believe many lies, He made me see people as my enemies and not him, He told me God could not love me and the list goes on and on… I challenge you to expose the old man. For the first time in your life, you will begin to experience the freedom in Christ.

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