This is mostly intended to be a confession. It all started with one prayer. Three of us friends were praying together one night as we have been weekly for the last 3 years, and my friend prayed over me asking God to fill me with creativity. It was new to me. I had never asked God for creativity before and never once heard anyone praying for creativity.
I believe it was one of the Holy Spirit led prayers. A year or so after that, my Pastor prayed the same prayer over me unprompted, at the church retreat. Well, the result of all that has been an overflow of creativity into this puny little mind. A Physical Therapist by profession, never have seen a writing class, never took a course other than Anatomy, Physiology or the like, I am in a place now where ideas and creativity gives birth to stories, thoughts and insights. An over flow of words into my mind. Over flow of thoughts that I can’t contain.
It is all well and good, but what am I to really do with this overflow? What do we do with any overflow of blessings?
I found myself not having the wisdom to be a good steward of it. I found myself using it in the wrong places for the wrong reasons. That is what we usually do when there is an excess.
I Thank God that He always helps us to realize it when there is spilling, when there is overflow, when there is folly in administering the gifts. I confessed to God and to my husband about this inability to be a good steward of the overflow. I meditated about Jesus using His gifts with wisdom, and how it led him to give away all and die as though with one who had none. In the light of this, I found myself in places and opportunities that are far away from my calling. No doubt I did a good job at what ever I did. People in fact told me I was good, though I knew I was spilling.
If God equipped me with gifts for the calling He has for me, it was time I define my calling. At this season in my life, He wants me to focus on being a godly wife who lifts, who builds, who grows the message God has put in my husband. If I don’t channel my blessings in this way, I might very well compete and put myself as a stumbling block for my husband and inhibit the message God has put in him. God has given me three precious children here to grow, nurture and equip for their generations. I have close friends whose lives are a blessing to me and God in His grace has given me the privilege of influencing. I have been given a lot to channel my gifts to.
It does not stop with that. I don’t want to put God’s calling in a box. I do not want to limit God and His ways, I am available as He leads me. That is the point, AS HE LEADS ME…
This definition of my calling or assignment in life is a very private thought applicable only to me, that I am taking the risk to publish. The motive of doing that is to make you ( my readers) think in a different way and define your calling.
It is a process for me to grow in humility as I come back to where God has called me. It is not very glorious in the worlds eyes. It is very humbling, but that is where God’s uncompromising glory dwells for me. I don’t want to miss it. I don’t want to lose it. It is precious for me. I do not care what the world thinks, once I experience the glory of God, I am ruined for the world and everything less than the fullness of His glory!
What about you? Are you having an overflow that you can’t handle? Are you spilling it to channeling it? Are you a good steward of the blessings?